Thursday, August 28, 2008 23:21
It's my first lab session and the thing that linked Chemistry to me was pure chaos.
Eight months void of titration, and I could not even gather all my apparatus without looking at others.
Eight months void of lab work, and I have lost almost all my accuracy and titration skills.
And eight months without stepping into the lab, I have forgotten how to stay calm and not get stressed out by every other person who seemed to know what they are doing in the lab.
Everything that could go wrong went wrong today. Even when I had religiously followed the protocol and pushed my patience beyond limits, something had to go wrong and something did go wrong, resulting in nothing else but an unconvincing titre value.
When I first printed out the lab manual, I never thought undergraduate lab work was gonna be this direct - it's just the same old titration we do everytime. But after I cleared the lab, I never thought titration - the same old titration we do everytime - was gonna be THIS agonizing.
Or perhaps it's just me. Because the guy on my right and the girl on my left seemed to be progressing at their comfortable pace and more discouragingly, they seemed to be confident of their results. So why was mine so problematic!
***
Sometimes, I really don't understand people in general. I was stood up on for some reasons I deemed to be lame. What started out to be a pleasant surprise was unintentionally thwarted, by whom I would not like to know. But the worse had yet to come. Just when the right number was finalized and so was everything else, a call came just to inform me that everything - literally everything that's related - was screwed.
By just a brilliant idea.
Call me petty, like I'd care. It's not as if they are the minority. And I certainly would not be eligible for project Frankenstein so what is so freaky about having dinner with me? I don't see what the issue here is, but it is an issue for me now.
What appeared to be a casual rejection, when done in big numbers, really gave me a hard time and I so don't appreciate the excuses made. For one you thwarted what was supposed to be a surprise. Then you stand me up. Listen, what is so difficult to just reject early when you aren't interested in having dinner with me? Why do you have to just pangseh me on critical timing like this?
While it is indeed human nature to conggregate with our own kinds, I don't see why globalisation hasn't had effects on your community yet. Because when I asked around, people around me were fine with crossing to another community.
Oh, turned out that we are the Frankensteins instead.
As you can see, the more I write, the more I fume. So I'll just stop here before I burn my room down.
Friday, August 22, 2008 23:59
What are the odds of meeting someone - someone who parted ways with you years ago, whom you eventually lost contact with, someone you thought you'll never cross paths with again - at some random place at random timings?
Of course, in Singapore's context, or even more specifically, in Uni's context, the odds are quite high, since uni is really a place where reunions happen on a regular basis. You get to meet your college friends whom you've not met for months, or you get to see your secondary school classmates you haven't seen for years, or primary chilhood friends you lost contact with for ages, and of course, one of your bestie during your past school life!
It was just a daily routine, to ride the lagged lift four levels down to fetch 750ml of water, when someone really familiar walked into my vision field when I stepped out of the lift. And then after confirming my guess we ended up putting the classic reunion scene.
Scream. Run. Hug.
Then screamed some more.
In the middle of the reunion a lift door opened and out came a guy, who looked and frowned at us as he would to a zoo animal. OEI halo excuse me hug also cannot ah?
And uni life leaves me with none other than appointments to go for and promises to keep and different groups of friends to juggle. And for the bulk of my waking 18 hours I spend on doing those, that I rarely have time solely for myself.
Yet, I'm really loving it. There are still a couple of little kids who haven't entered uni yet but it's okay, they will join the us again and we will be one big happy family again - just like when we were Dunman.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008 17:32
I was surprised by a whole new layout when I landed on my Blogger dashboard moments ago. This is how long I've not used Blogger. After MIA-ing for more than half a month I thought I ought to provide an explanation.
Here it goes:
After complaining how much a bitch SOME Malaysians can be, I landed myself in another camp which lasted for almost two weeks, which burned me out after the first week so I did not blog even when I've got ONE day break before part two of the camp started. Then the infamous START of uni (or more aptly put as SCHOOL REOPEN after 8 months' dormancy) where everything zoomed at top speed - have I mentioned that one of my lecturers finished explaining the whole tutorial that was nothing but nervewrecking in less than 45 minutes and resumed zooming past another chapter after a mere 15 minute break? - and I barely had any time to adjust to this whole new schedule before landing myself with a tutee who lives in CCK. So for three days per week I will have to make trips to CCK and back.
All these, all these, happened almost one after another and by the time I got back to my room, took my shower, there was almost no mood to blog anymore. Yes, I know, I know, there's internet of admirable speed available 24/7 from my room but you have to take into account how much attention MSN demands especially when you're in a mass convo. Oh, and have I mentioned late night supper (means at freaking 2 something) at Fong Seng?
In essence, the reason I disppeared is because there were just so much more exciting stuffs on my mind than just blogging. Oops!
Other than having my voice taken away for ONE entire week, uni life has been as great - if not greater - as I have imagined it to be. Frustrations during timetable planning aside, the fact that I'm no longer having rigid lesson blocks does bring about some tinge of excitement.
Yet having to construct, to draft and to plan my own timetable also means that I am in full control of my life now. My studies, at the very least. Lectures are no longer compulsory, so the thrill of 'ponning' lectures is non-existent, and therefore people just would not pon. (It's proven that when more rules being set, all the more likely they will be broken) Lecture notes have to be downloaded on our own, and nobody is going to be standing there and bark at you even if you show up with a set of imaginary notes.
It feels like we are being treated as adults. It's an encouraging sense of freedom - a sweet, tingling sensation. A stamp of recognition of your years on earth. Not forgetting the future that's been placed upon your shoulders.
Really (in Mrs Loke's accent), it's a new chapter. It's never felt so significant before everytime I enter a new environment - but this is really, truly, a whole new story.
I am an undergraduate now.
