Somewhere over the rainbow
way up high,
There's a land that I heard of
once in a lulluby.A song all too familiar, aye? A song with miraculous and mysterious force that digs out and resurrects innocent childhood memories, however deep you thought you've buried them, aye? Disney, it was. My all-time favourite.
I have long forgotten how simple a little girl I was, living in the 'Disney' shell where princes and princesses will definitely live happily ever after. I have also long forgotten how easy it was to create, and to feel joy and happiness. I have long forgotten, until 'Over The Rainbow' rang from my speakers, and brought back what used to be a simple, naive little schoolgirl.
But we are never who we were ten years ago. We meet things along the way that changes us from who we were, to who we are, and to who we will become. I know, I know, this sounds old and ancient because I've repeated and rephrased the same thing countless of times before. Urgh, if only I posses greater vocabulary and better expression.
I've just discovered a friend's secret hideout moments ago. Read it - everything - and finally understood the sequence of events, causes and effects, everything that was once a question mark. My queries are answered, what's next?
All was too familiar. The ache, the pain, the irony, the desire, the longing. I now begin to wonder if this is just another phase of life for most girls. Or could it be our punishment for believing in an ever, ever after with that certain special someone. But the difference between us two, is that while hers commited the despicable act of two-timing, mine just vanished from plain sight, leaving me hanging on the thin thread of faith, hovering feets above dangerous rocks. Yet what difference does it make, when our endings are the exact same episodes?
I admit I was rather disturbed at the way she chose to face it. I mean, I'm not exactly doing a superb job but at least - at least - I am ACTING normally, if I have to act. And when that emotional wave of depression swipes across, just say I'm doing an awesome job at clinging onto things that prevent me from being swept away with the tide. So my dear girl, you WILL surmount such turbulence, believe me. For countless ladies have fallen prey to this ruthless game, countless hearts shattered yet they managed to put everything back in place.
The bleeding has stopped. Blood has clotted, the wound turned into a scar. Not hurting on the surface anymore, but touch it not, for nobody know if it will ever tear apart, exposing a fresh wound again.
April Fool's, everyone.
