Sunday, September 30, 2007 15:29
I haven't been exercising my little grey cells much lately, partially due to post exam fatigue, partially due to shock.
Yes, shock. Shock at some surprisingly astonishing work someone put up on the net. I shall waste no descriptive words in attempt to describe that piece of music because you have to listen for yourself to feel which word can describe it best. Following the music on the scores just stuns me more.
I am breathless now. How can a guy create such an impression of an ancient chinese brothel with those chinese music themes using only the piano? Oh man he is my idol man. And everytime I listen, it's as if I hear something new.
Here's the link. Listen with your heart, and see where the music brings you.
http://www.gangqinpu.com/html/4004.htm***
Horroscope said something today - something I hope could come true, yet I know the probability of it coming true is negligible. What about thrusting myself onto the foreground and make myself stand out, it's all gonna end up the biggest joke of the year. Yeah then I'll be crowned the biggest joker queen ever existed. Applause everyone:(
Someone asked,"Why do you call yourself Miss STUPIDity?" I jokingly answered "I think it's funny."
Great. Now my life is out of control - every component of it, that is. It's as if I'm a top, spinning consistently all this while, when finally one day, I bumped against something, however small that was, and went off spining everywhere, out of my usual circuit. Then all went haywire, upside down. So why am I Miss stupidity? Because it can't be more apt!
A life of a joker, a joker's life. My life, is such a joke now. Everything I did, none was right. Every effort I put, yielded nothing. "Don't be discouraged. Keep working" is what most people said. But do they understand? Do they feel what I'm going through right now? Do they know what it's like, to see your intelligence and brain power waning away before your eyes? To see your hope and dreams shatter right before your eyes? To fall so far below your already-not-high expectations?
Mediocracy, like TaiJianLaoShi put it, should not be contented with. I don't like hovering with the average either. But do I have a choice? I was truly happy at first, that I cleared all papers so far with at least a D. But then, where does that put me? Where will that bring me? Not even a step closer to Pharma School.
My happy ending never existed. My wishes were never granted. My giving in was taken for granted. And now, laotianye is even taking my future away from me. That leaves me wonder, WHAT HAVE I DONE WRONG TO DESERVE ALL THIS? Why is everything taken away from me? Money. Grades. Life. Happiness.
I'm fatigued. But I can't let go. It's draining every strength I've left. But what can I do? What will YOU do?
I don't even know who the girl in my mirror is.
I am a joker. My life is a joke.
Thursday, September 27, 2007 14:42
When I was supposed to be glad, I was dismayed.
When I was supposed to buck up, I just could not care less.
When I was supposed to be excited and run around screaming, all that came out was indifference.
Upside down, my day today was. It's as if something just has to happen and you just won't be able to do what you are supposed to do, feel what you are supposed to feel, act the way you are supposed to act. Everything just fell far from expectation.
Like raindrops that fell almost continuously today, waves after waves hit me, hit me hard. It was peculiarly familiar, yet every single one of them smacked right at my face. It baffled, it hurt, but it did not surprise.
Those in the service line should have this motto where they live by - to serve and bring customers satisfaction. Toshiba disappointed me a little, and I did raise the issue when I collected my Baby Toshi. The girl was very understanding and kind, so however displeased I was, I made an effort to not make it difficult for her.(I guess most of you are well aware of what Ivy can do when Ivy is not happy. Remember the Grad Night incident? LOL) What I was displeased with was, being such an established multinational company, it was so capable of delivering unsatisfactory services to the public, the very ones they guaranteed satisfaction upon purchase of their products. Here, I'm speaking not about their knowledge regarding cutting edge technology, or their level of professionalism pertaining to software repair. These should not be disputable at all. My laptop was returned in a very good condition, and it looked as if it was reborn.
But, here's the catch. When I was checking on my baby, several things were not right, so I asked them to check again. Moments later, my baby did not squeak when I pulled it open. Good. Then I casually asked, "I was told that the technicians would perform an overall check on the system and such when I sent it in for repair. Did they check?" It was just a casual question, because I really thought they would and I was quite sure the answer would be a 'yes'. However, the girl still had to pause a while, flipped through the invoices, and finally came to answer,"I'm sorry Ma'am it wasn't written here that they performed the check on your laptop but would you excuse me for a moment, so I could go in and ask the technicians about it?"
What did you expect me to respond? "No you should have done it and there should be no need for you to check with the technicians who even quoted the wrong part for me, because your colleague made that promise a few weeks ago"? When I was startled at the amount of service charge I had to pay, the girl who attended to me told me that they would check through, and so I was pretty assured. But now, when she came back from inside, she said the technicians only performed a
general check on the comp - not a thorough one. Believe me, at that point in time, I could have slammed the table and have it over-turned.
After much questions the girl brought my baby in, again, and came out with another answer - "the technicians said that this is most PROBABLY because of the hinge. So if you would like to change the hinge as well? The crack that happened was most probably caused by the faulty right hinge." Of course I would very much like to change it, but I don't understand why, when I first sent it for repair, they never mentioned anything about the hinge?
I seriously don't blame the girl. It's the technicians I'm so not pleased with. If someone send you something you are good at, and tells you there's some problem with it, I don't see any reason for you not be able to tell what is causing the problem. Furthermore it's not some obscured software problem. The first time, they even quoted the wrong part for me. And for all the reasons in the world, I think, as their customer and the owner of the laptop, I have all the rights in the world to demand for a detailed explanation to my laptop problem. Thus I see no reason for me not being told about the hinge when I sent my baby in last time.
"I'm sorry but maybe because last time you already confirmed with us that there's a problem with the top assembly, so they did not check the hinge."
If this is an acceptable explanation for every unsatisfactory service, there should be need for consumer rights anymore. Come on, I'm not blind. I saw the crack, so obviously when I brought it for you to service, I'll tell you about the crack, right? So if you don't perform any further check and just blindly follow whatever problem I told you about my comp, do I even need to go to you for service and pay 150dollars for that? If I can tell exactly what is wrong with my comp, should there even be a need for your existance? Obviously I confirmed with you about the crack, because that's precisely the ONLY thing you told me that was faulty that day!
Of course I was so not going to take responsibility of this complication, so I voiced every dissatisfaction I had. The poor girl apologized again and again, and said that she would feedback to her manager regarding this matter. In the end, I told them to get me two hinges and I wanted them as soon as possible, or I'll really be unhappy. But this doesn't mean I can accept such thing to come from anyone in the service line, let alone some established multinational company.
After I left that place, they messaged me and apologized for the delay and stuff. Yes, they can apologize, but I won't be pacified until they can prove that they are able to deliver top quality service in future. Furthermore, I think I'm very already very kind in this matter. I did not demand for a satisfactory answer as to why there was a delay in processing my orders and why a wrong component was quoted, assuming top quality technicians. I have no idea how they are going to explain for such lack of professionalism in service.
That's why, even after I collected my baby, when I was supposed to feel very, very excited, I felt nothing.
Wednesday, September 26, 2007 11:31
I concluded that I'm so not environmentally friendly. I used up alot of papers to print piano scores to satisfy my obsession of new songs.
Post prelims timetable is enjoyable indeed, with procrastination never cease to happen every single day. We go to school as per normal, and enjoy breaks that sprawl everywhere throughout my days. As a result, we end at one something when there are only three solid lessons(lectures included) for the day.
So you might ask, what do I do with my break blocks? Well, it's not difficult to fathom, is it? I'm sitting in the Hub now, and was in the library half an hour ago.
***
"给你的爱一直很安静
我从一开始就下定决心
以为自己要的是曾经
却发现爱一定要有回音"
It was full moon yesterday. Where were you?
Were you there, looking at the same moon everyone was looking at?
And even if you were there, looking, were you looking at the same side of the moon as the rest?
Butterflies filled the sky after the surprise call. When will I learn to stop clinging on a faint streak of hope that always dissolves as soon as we say 'goodbye'?
Saturday, September 22, 2007 23:50
In case you haven't noticed, the song that's playing over and over again from your speaker is THE 'Secret' I have been so obsessed with.
In view of salvaging my deteriorating piano skills, I started learning 'Secret' today, hoping to refresh the part of my brain which controls sight reading and finger movement. Then, to my dismay/displeasure/horror/disappointment and what have they, I concluded that two years of abstinence from piano is NOT GOOD for your brain. Because playing the piano really trains your motor neurone and cerebral sort-of-reflex, not playing piano makes your neurones idle. You know, like those rubber bands, if you leave them idle, lying on the table for a long, long time, the moment you pick them up and try to pull, you'll find that they get so weak that they snap.
I have no idea if you understand the analogy of a rubber band above, but that's what came into mind when I had trouble sight-reading the entire piece with my used-to-be minimum speed possible. Looks like the treshold speed has to be lowered even further for me.
It's either this, or the piece is difficult. But saying it's difficult only serves as an excuse, with little or no credibility because a guy today played the SAME piece WITHOUT the scores at the SAME SPEED Jay Chou played in the movie. That means, Ivy aka Miss Stupidity is really stupid and she sucks at playing piano now.
Which means, to a person who does not admit to defeat easily(OKay, except Maths), I'll make sure I can play.
****
"It's a small world after all,
It's a small world after all,
It's a small world after all,
It's a small, small world"Bumping into so MANY people at so MANY places today just confirms one thing - it's really a small, small world, when practically everybody is liberated from the evil claws of prelims. Among those were: a girl in photosoc whom I know not of her name, Caroline Wong, and a whole lot of people who looked familiar. What can I say but coincidence?
But it only leaves me to wonder. If there are so many coincidences happening in one day, where is that ONE coincidence that I'm looking for? The ONE coincidence I'm waiting for? The ONE I've been hoping(sometimes, when I'm bored) to happen?
Where is the coincidence when I want it?
I start to think, display names can do alot. They do tell alot.
11:53
ARGHHHH!!!
Liberty at last!
Just like what Taitai said, I guess I could break my own Guiness World record for the longest concentration span ever in my life. Concentration span count: ONE MONTH.
This is how time flies without you knowing. Four weeks ago, all J2s need not go to school anymore. That, was the start of my quarantine - from shopping malls, of course. Four weeks later to the present, we are all liberated souls, soaring to wherever we wanna go, doing whatever we wanna do. Just how time flies, and I can't help but heave a silent sigh at this notion.
Four weeks ahead, we would repeat the same cycle as two weeks ago. There would hardly be any quality time spent with each other, let alone have fun. And shortly after that, people who are important to me will be going different direction. And then... and then... I won't even see them any frequently anymore.
This is saddening.
Wait. I should be over the moon, over the sky, now that my prelims are over. I shouldn't be melancholic and lament over time's cruel passing.
So Taitai, Mao, Suzzy and yours truly marched towards Marina Square right after Bio paper yesterday, on a mission too important to be disclosed. All I can say is that I hope our mission would not be a waste. Dinner was at Cartel(yes, again) because Yuki Yaki was simply tooooooo expensive for broke souls like us!
The world is so small, or rather, Singapore is so small. I realized this yesterday, when we were still deciding on where to fill our stomachs. In front of Yuki Yaki, I heard someone shouting my name from across. Turned out it was Aaung! Then I saw Pear with them. Shortly after that, I met Stella and Huimin.
Tell me, if Singapore isn't small, what is?
Pardon me for my simplicity in this post. I've gotta rush off for another appoinment at Orchard Road.
Wednesday, September 19, 2007 16:09
As I liberate myself from a life of a no-life mugger, I chanced on Sozai's friendster and found this personality test. It says "Know Yourself Better", so I decided to give it a shot.
Turns out there are things I just found out about myself, as indicated by those in
italics.
Your view on yourself:You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward.(So people like me afterall LOLs) You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:You are not looking merely for a girl/boyfriend -
you are looking for your life partner. Perhaps you should be more open-minded about who you spend time with. The person you are looking for might hide their charm under their exterior.(So I should look at nerds now?)
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.
The seriousness of your love:You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. (At this juncture, I have to reiterate that this was just a TEST.) But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?
Your views on educationEducation is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.
The right job for you:You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success. (Oh my, perils that entail from being fickle.)
How do you view success:You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.(Alright, I shall tune into Chemistry.com on TJCradio)
What are you most afraid of:You are afraid of things that you cannot control.
Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel. (I do?!)
Who is your true self:You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.
***
You start to see more lifeless souls being set free these days. What can best be done to commemorate my perseverence and efforts(though disputable) put in in isolating myself from the rest of the world, than to, well, spend my late afternoon in the hostel comp lab?
Okay I know there are lots of crows circling around the ceiling, but this is so far the best I can do for now, since my prelims aren't over OFFICIALLY. Most, if not all, of us consider today the day our souls break free.
And I was debating with myself if I should join the crowd(or most probably, lead the crowd) in expressing our utmost sorrows at the poor prospect of our prelim grades. Everybody thinks he did badly for exams after doing them, does he not? So there should, theoretically, be posts springing out everywhere in the blogosphere that laments on the much tormenting two weeks of our life. Theoretically that is, because you can't deny the existence of sceptics and cynics around, whose mere presence is to challenge and most possibly defy the norms. Just in case you have been staring st strings of english alphabet, the previous sentence means, I am NOT going to talk about my prelims anymore.
Which leaves me, nothing to talk about now. Which is more horrible - a no-life loser mugger, or a life-full exam loser? I usually opt for the lesser of two evils, but in this case, the severity of both evils is almost equitable. All I can think of, is to cajole my mind into thinking that my future will not be so much loser if I be a loser no-life mugger first. After all, fruits of labour always taste bitter, before yielding a truly fulfilling sweet sensation, do they not?
*I hate parting ways. Not especially if you have to toss your hair back, flash your signature smile, act as if you are perfectly fine with it and say "BYE!!" with your signature ringing tune of your voice, when inside, you still want to be around very, very much.*
Anyway, there's something I've always wanted to say very, very much. Whyqueen, are you reading this? Your reminiscing post made me so nostalgic! Whenever the clock strikes six, I'll be reminded of that airy dining hall, disgusting looking tree roots immersed in what they called 'soup', the long queues that never end, and most importantly, the valuable times we spent under that roof whom they called 'Nanyang Girls' Boarding School'. And now that we are already miles into different tracks, would it be possible that our paths cross again in future?
What I'm saying is, it's almost six now and I'm hungry and nostalgic.
Saturday, September 15, 2007 20:50
I was deeply annoyed, if not outraged, at how ridiculous chain messages and bulletins posted on bulletin boards have morphed into. And this includes text messages too.
They always have catchy titles - those that evoke your curiosity, sufficient to make you drag your mouse and click on them. Then when your page loads, you'll be presented either this long touching story of so and so, or some life lessons you think you should learn. Pretty educational and entertaining, aren't they?
Wait till you scroll to the bottom of the page.
It says "Foward this to such and such number of people and your wish will come true" OR "Foward this to such and such number or people and your love will ask you out!" Of course, save the best for the last, and it says "If you break this chain, you'll receive however long of bad luck" and what have they.
They prey on curiosity. They prey on people's unsuspecting eyes and their innocence. Once you open, you regret instantly. But what can you do? They have already explicitly told you that "you must pass this on or the ghost of so and so will come after you". Scared little mice we have become, so we pass them on to free ourselves from what that message prophecized.
At first, out of selfishness I passed them on, therefore 'harming' more people whom I called friends. Then more came and flooded my mailbox - all from those whom I call 'friends' as well. Eventually, I got so used to their gloomy prophecy of me had I chosen to break the chain, that I really did break it. Since that day, I never hit the 'forward' button, instead 'delete' button once I reached the bottom of the page.
But what really annoyed me is this. Friendster bulletin board is no longer for bulletins. It's flooded with such messages that require you to repost so that you won't face the misfortune they mentioned. So people go reposting them, and they occupy the entire bulletin board. Great, no room for constructive bulletins.
One particularly outrageous I've opened says "you must repost this or your dad will die." Curiosity indeed have the power to kill a cat. I say, if people really go dying mysteriously just because people choose to defy that message, then psycho murderers out there like that Russian guy wouldn't need to waste time postulating a formula for executing his victims. All he need to do is be a comp-literate, and let the net do the work.
So I did not repost, believe it or not. Not because I'm not filial. I love my daddy VERy, very much, but I see myself as an idiot if I really believe in what that rubbish of a message said.
I know many will say "No one forced you to open it what. You opened it willingly. So don't go complain." True, but what have we turned mailboxes and bulletin boards to?
Bins with crap messages, they are.
So this is a warning, for you who read this. To make sure you are not cursed by me, never direct these kind of crap to me. And yep, I will never take any look at bulletin boards anymore.
On a lighter note, I got this email from Amelia. Part of it wrote:
"Amateurs built the ark
Professionals built the Titanic."
Interesting.
Friday, September 14, 2007 21:05
I felt like a giant. The Earth shuddered at my foot again.
When Thu said she saw lamppost swaying like a pendulum, I was so tickled. But this is no funny joke. At the same time the lamppost turned into a pendulum, houses were dilapidated in Sumatra.
This morning, I was woken up by this little creaking noise I heard in my dream. I opened my eyes wide, at the same time straining my ears to make out where that noise came from. Then I finally concluded that it wasn't just my imagination - that creaking noise, however soft and insignificant it sounded(to a sleeping log like my roomate), seemed to come from all directions! In desperation for an answer, I racked through my memory, when I stopped at a piece of news dated two days ago - that fateful day when a strong tremor was felt. The news-broadcaster said something like, "signs of an earthquake include swaying objects around your area, tremors from the ground, and
creaking sound from the walls"
OH MY GOODNESS! I thought. Is it coming again? It could well be one of the aftershocks. Then when I took out today's papers, you can very much guess what news was waving at my face.
"Four quakes in 24 hours" (or something like that. I can't remember the title exactly)
The reports are intimidating. It's as if they are spelling out an imminent doom.
Well, all of us are more or less half way through this battle. A battle between our evil tutors and us! But we will trash them flat, won't we? Hah I wish LOL! But in any case, we are already halfway through. Persevere, people! We will prevail. Liberty is just round the corner.
I will prevail. Yes I will.
Thursday, September 13, 2007 16:14
I strode out of that battle, physically drained and mentally exhausted.
Yet a little triumphant. I prevailed, again.
God has blessed women with excellent tolerance - something I learnt particularly well today.
It was startlingly horrible. Halfway through the paper, it corrupted my thinking process. For times I could even envision myself abandoning the paper and speed right for home.
I walked out of the school, yet I did not feel like stepping on solid grounds. I tried to smile back at the familiar faces smiling at me, bidding goodbye for the day. Yet I knew, I looked nothing like smiling. More like wincing.
The sight of my bed was heavenly. Still, it did little to alleviate the pain.
I wailed, I screamed. But the world beyond my door heard silence.
I was, in fact, alone.
Fatigued, I stopped, and lay still. The silence was menacing enough.
My mind was emptied of everything except for one - the pain. All I did, all I could do, was to lay there while waiting for it to ease.
It was stubborn; it was malicious. It tried my tolerance, time and again.
I must have passed out, succumbed to its trials. Yet I arose, fresh and victorious.
~It was the most horrible cramps ever.~
Natural disaster greeted Indonesia yesterday with a shake. Not a hand shake but an earth shake. Tremors were felt as far as Thailand even, according to a report. And yes, it was of course felt in the very hostel I reside in.
I was half lying on my bed, backed against the wall, and reluctantly flipping my Bio notes when my legs(which were crossed) suddenly swayed. It caught my attention, and I stared at my own legs moving against my will. They swayed even more. I thought I was SO WEAK that I even swayed with the wind. Must the exam manace, I thought.
It was until I went down to pass Tawan her calculator that I realized, that it wasn't at all because of my ill health! Throngs of crowds gathered at the ground floor of the hostel. Something about crowds fascinates me always - you don't have to talk to any of them, just stay around, and you'll be able to pick up the cause of anxiety real fast. The news broadcaster's voice on Channel News Asia was booming across the ground floor TV lounge, frequently articulating words like earthquake, Indonesia, Bengkulu etc.
Natural disaster has taken its course again. Man, when faced with such forces of nature, seem so insignificant notwithstanding his boast of scientific and technological progress. Despite much infrastructure being put in place, a shake from the base of the sea sent all of them crumbling to their feets. Man can only make sure of his survival as far as possible, but nothing can be done to deter such menacing forces from testing Man's resilience.
Two big news made it to the headlines today. One is our neighbour's plight, another is Shinzo Abe's resignation. As sudden as the former, the latter surprised me quite a lot. And believe me, I wasn't in favour of his resignation, despite his 'scrambled priority' and the scandals in his cabinet. I believe he was clean enough.
But this is politics. This is democracy. The opposition party gained support of the majority and increased their influence in the Upper House. So more voiceboxes naturally mean louder volume. However, despite his final decision to resign, people still criticized him. Give him a break, man. He is a man after all, not a deity, therefore to err is only being human.
I think he is a man who deserves my respect, although I don't quite like the idea of him succumbing to pressures around him. Then again, what else can he possibly do, with an avalanche of pressures from the opposition and a vacuum of support from his people? What he did was brave, that is, to step onto the stage, give a remarkable resignation speech(in my opinion, still entails his intention of winning some people over), and step down and make a dignified exit.
I wonder if I'll ever look up on any other Japan Prime Minister the way I look up on Abe(in his last public presence, of course).
Tuesday, September 11, 2007 19:04
When I decided to write on the question "do you agree that we live in a dangerous world?" and expressed my stand as "yes" during GP on Monday, I did it plainly out of choosing the best and the fastest way to producing a satisfactory script for my Prelims. As I paved my way through in words, my essay turned out to be a grim apocalypse - a little melodramatic, a little bleak - but it was all for the effect.
Little had I thought on Monday, that I would agree more with myself with each passing day.
We
do live in a dangerous world.
When I flipped through the papers today(yes, in DESPERATE attempt to salvage my ever slipping GP grades, in DESPERATION as the A's corners) the usual appeared - so and so arrested for such and such, such and such bombed what and when, who and who died in the suicide bombings. The papers barely reported any 'model city' nor 'good economic progress' or 'stable political states'. Of course, the nature of the papers is to report the
happenings around us, and these
happenings always entail harm and instability to be classified as
happenings worth the reports.
I continued flipping nonchalantly, occasionly displaying vague interests in articles talking about bombings(somehow I must have been desensitized towards such kinds of violence, as your GP tutor puts it), until I stopped dead at this picture depicting an angry guy burning a country flag. Not just ANY country flag - it's the MALAYSIAN flag. A gasp escaped as my reflex.
Burning national flag is showing outright disrespect to the country whose flag is being burnt. To me, burning MY country flag, when MY country isn't doing anything which provoked the international body, is A CRIME. When my country has not done anything so infuriating, it makes me wonder, what's that hatred that drove the guy to burn the flag? People burnt so and so's flag, because political representatives of so and so said such and such that provoked another so and so, so much. What has Malaysia done?
Then I understood what the karma was. So there was this rally that turned violent, which ended with open fire by the police, injuring two of the rioters. OK, standard protest-turn-bloody scenario. It started with a rally, then a protest from those who thought otherwise, and then some mysterious encounter between two individuals with differing beliegs that translated into a full scale, large scale hostility between ALL members of both communities. And now what? Figures from political parties supported by those in the clash 'supported' their supporters, by shooting daggers aimed at those at the opposing side. Retaliation followed, and everybody is poking everybody else for starting everything.
People were injured, so people were angry. When people get angry, they vent their anger and frustration(and also the element of injustice, in my opinion) on other people, furthing infuriating others. So, everyone got so angry, that they don't see the priceless value in people's life, or the sanctity of life. Then they go killing each other in the end.
The thing is, what was the trigger? I dare say, other than the very first two people who had the mysterious encounter with each other, which unfortunately cannot be verified since everybody is putting the blame on everybody else, further complicating the matter. So, from perhaps just a brush on the shoulder, just a 'tsk' from the irritated person, it became a deliberate push, and then pre-mediated fight, and then, well, what you see today.
If you ask me, they are STUPID.
So they finally made it to overseas papers. With nothing so noble to be talked highly of. Then readers - those with eyes so discerning and calm in sorting the causes and effects out(something those in conflict are oblivious to) - come around and comment on their stupidity. What a good image you painted of your country to foreigners.
Essentially, as I put things into perspective, it is to gain attention - something the guy said particularly correct. The media's, the government's, the citizens'. There wasn't even a need to protest in the first place, if it wasn't for fear of losing out to the opposite party. Maybe I'm too young to understand the game of politics, but why can't those who are not in support of the party organizing the rally just keep quiet? The elections are coming, and surely people are out there trying to campaign for popularity. Even if they are not in your favour, is there even a need to throw stones at them just because they entered the town you reside in? You don't own the town, and certain not every single person in that town support the very party you support.
So what's the agitation, what's the deal? Can't you - you who call yourselves
Malaysians - wake UP and grow UP?
Normally people burn national flags from other countries not native to them, in display of extreme hatred. But the guy who was captured was a MALAYSIAN, burning the MALAYSIAN flag. I feel like grabbing his collar, shaking him violently to disperse that clot in his brain that caused him to react in this, unjustifiable manner. Slapping him would just dirty my hands further.
I conclude that I'm rather nationalistic. I see the good in my country, and I see the efforts the leaders put in to bring the country up the ladder of modernization. I certainly would not approve of those trying to discredit and defame them.
You see, someone amongst us actually hates our country so much, that they will burn our flag with so much hatred. The camera captured only one guy, but who knows how many such people are out there, amidst us?
A dangerous world indeed to be dwelling in these days.
Saturday, September 08, 2007 09:18
It dawned on me just a moment ago, and I decided to pen it down to always remind myself.
It was superb weather when I got up this morning. Superb in most's definition, means so windy and cool that most people will kick up a big din if you were to interrupt their sleep amidst such weather.
But I woke up - and realized how sleeping through such weather actually limits our satisfaction.
If the above sounds Econs to you, congrats, for you are a harworking person who studies Econs. But no, it's not even the least Econs I'm talking about here.
You see, people generally sleep like a log, especially indisputable in such cool weather. Once you sleep, you have no idea how good the weather is, or how nice you feel when the wind softly caress your face, or the fresh scent of the morning breeze fill your lungs. All you care, is to heave your chests up and down so that you'll wake up later. What a waste of a rare, good weather like this!
For eighteen years I've been sleeping through. Eighteen years later, I'm finally awake to understand, that in order to maximise satisfaction gained from such weather, we musn't join and be one of the commons - we must dare to be different, then you'll see things in a different light, and who knows, you might even be enlightened!
And now, I shall go against my word, and join the 'commons' - the MUGGING community. I won't be different in this aspect.
Thursday, September 06, 2007 15:36
Subjective.
That's what the world is today. Freedom of speech encouraged boundary-less expression of opinions and beliefs. Consequently, like fungi after a brief rain, everything sprouts from everywhere.
Who are we to decide which ones are worthy of attention and which ones are not?
Who are we to tell which ones are crap and which ones are gold?
I came across this article talking about blogs today. The writer adopts a rather cynical, sarcastic, and arrogant tone which, by far, sort of irritated me a little. Not so much about her criticising the content found on the blogosphere, but rather her belittling the level of intelligence - and discretion - bloggers possess, and show, while they blog. She deemed articles - proses, rather - found on blogs as something unworthy to read because their authors take little notice of their audience, or how flaw-plagued the articles are in terms of sentence structure or grammar, or how biased and misleading the articles are, and how facts are bent and tweaked to the authors' liking to sort-of influence the masses.
If she is talking about certain blogs used by syndicates to spread extremist beliefs, then she's right. These blogs are propaganda, and yes, they do tweak and bend the facts, no a little but rather a great deal, to influence the masses to enemize certain groups of people.
While I agree to her statement, that to find a blog with substance amidst a vast number of blogs in the blogosphere is a difficult job, I do not - and will not - approve of her using the term "haystack" to describe the rest of the blogger population. A blog, when it was first founded, served as a tool to convey thoughts and messages of an individual. So what is so "haystack"-ey with people's emotions and plights, as they are published in blogs?
The author said she has always liked magazines, newspapers and other more
proper published articles, because they(the articles) were sent through rounds of auditting and quality control, so that those published are of substance. Well, I can't counter-argue that, of course. Articles in national papers and mainstream magazines are of course of remarkable quality.
But how do you defend those written in tabloids? In propaganda magazines?
Are the articles not tailor-made to convey a certain slanted message? Are the articles not of trivial content? Most importantly, were the articles not sent for auditting and 'quality control' prior to being published? How do you defend these, when you condemn articles in blogs for lack of substance?
And who are you to deem those written in blogs are not substantial? You mean others' life and their plight is not worth your interest and attention at all? You mean your life is so fulfilling, that everything others go through is simply too insignificant?
Who are YOU? Empathetic fellow?
My blog may just be another needle amidst a sea of similar looking pins - yes
similar looking pins, not
haystack - but this needle is fully functional. That is, to burst ego bubbles like yours. It may just be plain looking, but it is certainly not the rusted iron junk you perceive - and generalized - it to be.
Tuesday, September 04, 2007 18:31
I have absolutely NO IDEA why I failed to upload pictures to my Friendster. Why are they depriving me of that one little chance to show the world I'm still alive and kicking??
I'm not allowed to blog. Not for the time being at least. And I can't even post some recent pictures of me and peeps. I must have appeared dead to most of the world now. For this, I am so depressed.
Yongyi lamented on something about restrictions we face, now that we are
1. Scholars, and
2. Taking our A's soon.
And I must say, I can't agree more to this.
ASEAN dance is in half an hour's time. But there's no point going this year. That social animal in me is fighting the restraints of a cage that ruthlessly binds it down with pre-prelims horror. And oh my. Seeing my juniors all dressed up did everything to re-ignite the desire to get out of my notes and party.
The girls are just so pretty and daity in their dresses and gowns! Some even look outstandingly cute and unusually sexy! It really brought back memories of last year's ASEAN dance. Well, at least the parts where we just partied like nobody's business.
I came to a conclusion, that in my whole life, partying and clubbing will never cease for me. Because despite everything I've told myself to keep myself staring at my bio notes, I can feel ants crawling everywhere in me, fuelling my desire to take out my makeup pouch and start colouring my eyes.
No, I shall not give myself another reason to regret when I do my prelims, which are OHMYGOD in less than five days' time.
Saturday, September 01, 2007 11:04
After contemplating for five days, I decided to send my Baby Toshi(I just named her spontaneously. And decided her sex on the spot.) to the best hospital for diagnosis. I checked the map and the exact location of that hospital, recommended by a polyclinic which my friend Lele introduced, just to find that I had to go to some funny Kallang Sector that is nowhere near Kallang. I tried to minimize cost by checking out the buses and see which one plies to that area, just to find that I'll do better with a cab. So in conclusion, I hailed a cab, whose driver stunned at the mentioning of 'Kallang Sector' at first, and sped(metaphorically of course, to create the impression of urgency) all the way to The Hospital.
Once I got off the cab, I headed straight for the Emergency Room, with Baby Toshi in my arms. It didn't take long before our number was called, and I, apprehensively, went up to Counter 2 with my Baby. I flipped her over, so that the crack on her spine was visible. The Doctor did some checks on her - her spine in particular - and took her inside where she was to be examined further by the Specialists. Moments later, the Doctor came out of the A&E room with my Baby Toshi, and I was told that my baby's condition was rather serious and that they could not just rectify that little crack on her spine, but rather, they had to change her backbone altogether.
I asked how long would my baby take to fully recover, and the Doctor said, that because my baby's spine has to be preordered before the surgery can be performed, it might take a couple of weeks. So the usual thing followed - I was asked for my baby's particulars as well as mine, and I gave every information they needed.
Then the Doctor quoted the full medical fees I would have to pay if my baby were to be operated there. 170 dollars, and only 70 was for her new backbone. The rest was for the Doctors' expertise! OH MY GOD OH MY GOD! And because my baby was not from Singapore, I had to pay 50 dollars MORE for service charge! But then again, I had no choice since I wanted the best treatment for my baby and that was The Best Hospital.
After filling in everything and made the payment, I bid goodbye to Baby Toshi, and the Doctor sent her to the ICU, where she will lie, waiting for her new backbone to arrive, and her surgery to be done. As for me, I left The Hospital, feeling empty and alone. Empty as my life would be void of my baby for another three weeks, and alone because, well, I was all by myself that time.
Lucky for me, I was meeting Yao at Centrepoint for lunch. So, lucky for me, my day was not lonely at all.
And finally, I figured out the way to get to The Hospital by bus. So three weeks later, when they call me to inform me that the surgery is completed, I can save money by not taking cab there!
