Walking on the streets today, I felt as if I’ve touched some portkey and being transported to Genting Highlands. The only thing which brought me back to reality was the temperature surrounding me. It was slightly higher than normal (aka good) days, which was much higher than Genting’s. It is difficult to not have this illusion that you are in some foggy highlands, for the haze that enveloped this region today was thick. THICK. I don’t know how high the PSI was, but any soul can make a smart guess, around 90 plus.
That person still has not made any initiative to send me a message as a follow up from VJ open house. *rolls eyes* What is his problem!?
Alright, perhaps it was mine, but call me sensitive or selfish, whatever it is, I still don’t think I am the one to be blamed.
He did say hi to me first, but I was too overwhelmed to see my friend whom I have not met for a long time, so I only returned his ‘hi’ in a very hurried manner, and flew to my friend. Perhaps he was offended? From then on, we never acknowledged each other’s presence. You can dismiss that as oversensitivity on my part, but the same thing happened even when I was about to leave the campus. I saw the usual ‘them’, the rest said goodbye to me and so I returned with grace. It just seemed purposeful of me to ignore his presence by not even looking in his direction when I said goodbye. Then at the bus stop I was talking on the phone, yet when ‘they’ walked pass me they (without him) still said goodbye for one last time. Except him.
Have I done wrong? My pride and my ego forbid me to pull a smiley face and face him with the usual well-crafted smile. That smile can only come from within.
I don’t want to lose someone who was so close to me just like that. It just does not seem right. Ego and pride have reduced many possibilities to zero. How long must I take to put the ego and pride behind my face?
Perhaps forever.
And I’m on shopping ban AGAIN. The second time in one year. What is wrong with me!? Can I not just stay home and face the four walls instead of floating amidst temptations which eventually cost me a BOMB?
Heh, if I can, there won’t be shopping ban in the first place.
